Really Good Quotes

Greetings, Quotaholics:

In these economic times we hear a lot about donating our time to help others. This help can range from helping at a local homeless shelter to picking up trash along the highways.

Many states have programs such as the “Adopt A Highway” program where local groups and organizations can meet periodically to pick up trash along their adopted stretch of road. In exchange the State places signs along the highway with the names of the adopting groups. This program saves taxpayer funds and also gives the organizations some publicity.

But what happens when the group that volunteers to help is one that the State would rather not publicize?

According to an article on Fox News, that is exactly the problem faced by Missouri when the local Ku Klux Klan wanted to adopt a stretch of highway. They were rejected and the case went all the way to The Supreme Court.

At the time, the state could reject applications for the program from groups that denied membership based on race or had a history of violence. But in 2005 the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that membership in the Adopt-A-Highway program can’t be denied because of a group’s political beliefs.

“‘It’s a First Amendment thing, and we can’t discriminate as long as they pick up the trash,’ said Bob Edwards, a spokesman for the transportation department’s office in Springfield.”

“The state can deny an organization’s application only if it has members who have been convicted of violent criminal activity within the past 10 years.”

Now the Springfield unit of the National Socialist Movement, a neo-Nazi group, has committed to cleaning up trash along a half-mile section of Highway 160 near the Springfield city limits. Two signs noting the group’s membership in the Adopt-A-Highway program went up in October but drew attention only recently when the group picked up litter as part of a gathering in Springfield.

“The NSM Springfield unit decided to take part in the highway project because it wants to clean up the community, said Ariana Glass, a 16-year-old member of the youth division of the group.”

“Edwards said his department had received only one phone call asking why the National Socialist group was allowed to adopt the highway.”

It appears that local people aren’t too concerned with this group picking up trash along the highway, but I suspect now that it has drawn national news coverage we will hear a lot more about it.

So should the State have the right to refuse to let controversial groups participate in programs such as Adopt A Highway? Would you be offended if the State erected signs with the names of such groups along the highways in your area? Is this a case of looking a gift horse in the mouth and the public should be grateful for any help volunteered? Or do you see this as a case of an anti-social group getting to use the First Amendment to flaunt their beliefs in our faces?

Cleaning up,

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"No, not rich. I am a poor man with money, which is not the same thing." - Gabriel García Márquez, Colombian novelist and short-story writer

"A man knows he is growing old because he begins to look like his father." - Gabriel García Márquez, Colombian novelist and short-story writer

"Action is more generally understood than words. The lift of an eyebrow, however faint, may convey more than a hundred words. A truly capable actor must possess a thorough grounding in pantomime." - Charlie Chaplin

"Whatever poet, orator or sage may say of it, old age is still old age." - Sinclair Lewis

E-Mail the Imp

I like those “Top Ten” lists that keep popping up…they appear for almost anything. Top Ten Hollywood Stars, Top Ten Popular Songs of All Time, Top Ten Vacation Spots, Top Ten Most Popular Dog Breeds, and there’s probably a Top Ten list somewhere for the Ugliest Redneck Truck.

But I also distrust most of them. I have to wonder who decided to make up the list and why. Most of all I wonder about the criteria used to pick the entries on the list. Some of the lists come out every year, Like the Top Ten Hollywood Stars, the list changes each year depending on the popularity of current movies or even whether or not the star has a movie in circulation. Sometimes entry to the list might be determined by number of times the star was arrested or the amount of cleavage captured by the paparazzi.

There are some Top Ten lists that aren’t as whimsical or unimportant in the overall scheme of things as whom is wearing what, or who is doing what to whomever. Crime statistics are one such list, medical problems are another. If you Google for a Top Ten list, you need to make sure it’s worded correctly, or you’ll get off on the wrong track.

I read an article on a new cancer fighting method, so I decided to Google a Top Ten list of the most serious medical problems. Here’s what I ended up with:

1 Back or neck problems
2 Allergies
3 Arthritis or rheumatism
4 Difficulty walking
5 Frequent headaches
6 Lung problems
7 Digestive problems
8 Gynecological problems
9 Anxiety attacks
10 Heart problems or chest pain

Since I was looking for cancer and it didn’t appear, I tried again by looking for “Top Ten Incurable Diseases”, and topping the list was the Common Cold. Since cancer came in second, I was satisfied and quit looking.

Now to back track on this tangent and get to my main point…a new way of fighting cancer. Scientists at the Moscow Laboratory of Transgenic Medications noted that medications such as mabtera, herceptin or avastin that fight cancer cells are made from laboratory raised luminescent flies, rabbits, and mice. However the yields are small and dosages are extremely expensive. A further problem is the possibility that medicines produced from animals may be infected with viruses that could be deadly in their own right.

The solution was to engineer plants to produce the same product faster and in greater quantities than was possible using animals. The resulting plant of choice was tobacco, wild Australian tobacco to be precise. Scientists are hopeful that they will eventually be able to produce a universal anti-cancer drug.

I envision Russian scientists going even further in their research. Russians are among the heaviest smokers on the planet…so continuing research should also focus on developing a strain that doesn’t contain carcinogens and isn’t addictive. Combine these traits with a built in anti-cancer drug and you’ve suddenly developed a medication that is a cancer “Silver Bullet”.

Smoking restrictions around the world will have to be repealed and smokers could argue that second hand smoke is now a therapy instead of a deadly curse and therefore be able to charge their co-workers for their dosages of medication.

I just hope my lungs hold out long enough to reap the benefits of smoking.

The Bad Sied

Speak right up!

I thought that was a better line than it turned out to be.  Can’t win them all I guess…

Next opening line…
One night I decided for kicks…

Hints:  Here’s a great new rhyming/composition tool.  http://www.writerhymes.com/
There’s also a great rhyming dictionary at http://www.rhymezone.com/
Limerick rules.  http://freespace.virgin.net/merrick.sheldon/limerickrules.htm 

Submit Opening Line
Submit Limerick

Are you now going to adopt insulting terms for Afro-Americans, Hispanics, Jews, Italians, Native Americans etc.? If so, please let me know, so that I can
unsubscribe. - Best wishes, Julian.

[Thanks for the comment Julian. I think if you have been a subscriber for any length of time you already know that all views are represented RGQ. That certainly won’t change just because Obama is now the President.

The limerick line you object to is from a classic limerick which I found in an article published in The Independent, a UK publication. The article begins;

There was was a man… The great limerick craze of 1907

It began as a magazine stunt, then millions joined the hunt. The craze swept the land; some said it should be banned. The postmen bore the brunt

In September 1907 a magazine called London Opinion offered a big cash prize for the reader who could come up with the best last line for the following limerick:

There was a young lady of Ryde
Whose locks were consider’bly dyed.
The hue of her hair
Made everyone stare…

Later in the article;

Indeed some limerick experts maintain that the true limerick, as a folk form, is always obscene. The American scholar Gershon Legman insisted that bawdy humour was a prerequisite:

There was a young queer from Khartoum
Who took a lesbian up to his room.
They argued all night
As to who had the right
To do what and with which and to whom.

So limericks have been around for a very long time, and most are somewhat obscene in nature. I wouldn’t recommend the Poet Tree section to anyone easily offended. I even warned the easily offended when I printed that limerick, “As you know, limericks are better when they are a little dirty. So here’s an oldie that can offend almost anybody.”

Now I’m from Arkansas, so I’m accustomed to being called a redneck, but I suspect the writers who submitted limericks might be a little offended.

But there are a few problems with your basic argument. First I printed the offending limerick on the 19th, the day before Obama was sworn in. Trying to tie that limerick to some sort of racist attitude seems a bit of a stretch. Second, the limerick was originally printed in 1907. Third, limericks were popular in the UK long before they came to America. Fourth, the limerick in question was written and published in the UK long before any of us were born.

I don’t think you will notice a change in the content of RGQ just because there is a new president. Politics will remain off limits. I certainly don’t want anyone to unsubscribe, so the best advice I can offer is to skip the limericks.  Remember,

The limerick packs laughs anatomical
Into space that is quite economical.
But the good ones I’ve seen
So seldom are clean -
And the clean ones so seldom are comical. — Anonymous]



Re: Husbands

I know what you mean Patti–we just had our 30th last December. My husband isn’t perfect, in fact, he drives me totally crazy some days and I try to return the favor! We complement each other in many ways–but we definitely have our differences. It seems they are just enough to balance our lives together and keep our love going.

What I can’t figure out is how this has worked for us and no one else in my family. I have 3 brothers and 2 sisters, and between them and my parents, there have been many divorces and remarriages, some going into multiple do overs. We were all raised with the same basic beliefs in family, fidelity, even the same religious beliefs. Out of all this, my father’s parents and my husband and I are the only ones to have a marriage survive. What would cause this to work for us and none of the rest of my siblings or parents? We have made the effort to work through many of our problems over the years, and our decision to marry was not made lightly, I had to think long and hard about if I loved him enough to stick with him for life.

I don’t think anyone else gave up easily or married on a whim–it just didn’t work as well for them. Who knows what causes this. Maybe a willingness to be more tolerant of the differences helps, or just the fact that there are differences! I know it wouldn’t work if we were more alike, or were moody at the same time, or even liked more of the same things. I don’t even want him to like the same things–I like having the privacy to enjoy my own pursuits while still knowing that he will join if asked, whether he wants to or not, and vice versa. - Ruth in WA



Wow, ain’t that the truth. If your mate is perfect in every way, it becomes so annoying that after a few years, bang, they’re dead. After 45 years together, I consider my wife to be my best friend; she knows me like no one else can, and she respects me, as I do her, we listen to each other and assist each other in ways that no one else ever could. Do we annoy each other? Sure do, but our love for each other helps us understand each other. We are still two individuals who chose to live together. Different families, different backgrounds, education, upbringing, views of the world, etc, etc. But so what? We’re comfortable with each other. Imperfect? You bet we are. And made for each other.
Kids today want it all, and they want it right now. If the new mate doesn’t fit into their plans, good bye. It took years to get to our present state and a lot of hard times too. Now kids want it all without the hard times. Nothing but ‘happily ever after’. Good luck with that. And don’t forget the pre-nup… - Jacques ( in S-E Ontario)



Patti said, "While there are times when I wish Dick was just a little bit more," "Is there such a thing as perfection?"
I think all of us fellas wish that. - Jesse in Mount Isa, Australia



Re:  The Economy

I agree with Robert from Southern California that spending will help us recover from our economic downturn. Unfortunately the fear of incurring additional or new debt in the face of a possible loss of future income if your job goes south will keep many away from realtors and car dealers.

I’m lucky, I have only five house payments left and decided to take the opportunity offered by auto dealers to upgrade the family "fleet". I know that in short order what would be a house payment will cover two auto loans. I downgraded from a Ford Crown Vic to a less thirsty Chevy Cobalt, upgraded the wife from an older Civic to a Civic Hybrid, and was able to pick up a used Ford Ranger at a beautiful price. (The Cobalt couldn’t handle hauling my trailer full of yard waste.)

Being on a fixed retirement income that isn’t tied to a stock or bond portfolio, I decided to take the risk against knowing that prices of most things will rise, but I’m confident that I will still have an income so I can tighten my belt a bit if need be. I’m also lucky that I have cash reserves to fall back on in emergencies. Most people don’t have a built in safety net that I do. Hell, I can even go back to work if I have to, I still receive job offers after being out of the market place for over ten years.

If there were any assurances that the economy wouldn’t get any worse, possibly spending would pick up again. But the news is bad…GM just announced they may still go under in a few months if bailout money isn’t received in time. That doesn’t inspire the masses to buy Buicks to save the world economy….sied



Re: Sied’s piece on ‘brain buckets’

In the early ’60’s I had a big 650 Triumph that I drove with reckless abandon. Some of my buddies had big 500cc BSA’s, and few Nortons and even one guy had a 1000cc Vincent Black Shadow that *nothing* could beat. Some had helmets, but I couldn’t afford one… One night, I borrowed a friend’s helmet as we were going out "scrambling" in a local park and it was raining. The next morning, on my way to *return* the helmet, I was cut off by a cab. Woke up 8 days later in a hospital bed with a fractured skull, concussion, my right eye turned inward at a 60 degree angle and my sense of balance destroyed. Took me over a year to learn to walk properly, and still can’t spin around fast without falling on my ass. And this happened 47 years ago. And yet, they’re still out there today, running around without a helmet driving like maniacs… sigh… But I look at the bright side: It’s Darwin, hard at work, culling the herd… - Jacques ( in S-E Ontario)

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